Home » Archives » April 2006 » Missy Can't Even Pronounce Pneumothorax!
[Previous entry: "Twist Inflation"] [Next entry: "Another Peeve to Pet. Another Peeve... to Pet."]

04/10/2006: Missy Can't Even Pronounce Pneumothorax!


I had a delightful afternoon of Scrabble yesterday with my friends Kim and Michelle and Jeff. Little dogs playing at our feet, tiles clicking softly... Fantastic. I've known Kim and Michelle since we were all in the Disney Writers' Fellowship together. It was that kind of bonding experience, and I cannot recommend it highly enough (It's now the ABC Writing Fellowship). In addition to meeting people who will be your friends for life, you also get good practical writing advice and the thrill of seeing doors open that would have been hard to even approach otherwise.

As part of the fellowship, we television fellows (as opposed to the feature fellows – we were recruited in two camps), wrote a series of comedy spec scripts under the guidance of Disney executives. Comedy scripts only, because Disney was only producing comedies back then. We also were required to attend at least one sitcom taping per week. This began as a treat, and quickly became a chore. Our chaperoning executive actually pulled us out of the audience at Blossom one week because the Joey Lawrence fans were making a high-pitched sound of delight that was causing us physical harm.

There was also a strong recommendation that the execs made to us. They told us to hold our own little mini table reads at home, using the other fellows as actors, so that we could hear our specs. Nothing fancy, just a group of people with scripts on their laps. Having this kind of read is a suggestion you will probably hear from others as well.

I would exercise caution.

Homemade table reads are great if you're writing a feature or a pilot or a play. If you've created the characters, I mean. You can learn a lot about what makes dialogue sound natural. You'll also realize how very, very, long a chunk of dialogue is when it's read out loud. You'll probably end up cutting words out of every line you've written.

But even then, there is a downside. If your friends are not actors, they may butcher what you've written. And then their awkward line readings are in your head!

And if you're dealing with a spec script for an existing show, you've got even bigger problems. One of your most precious aides in this whole process is your ability to "hear" your actors reading your lines. You want to be able to "hear" Hugh Laurie or Edward James Olmos or Jamie Pressly when you read your script. And the one time that I GUARANTEE that will not happen is when your friend Missy is reading the role of Dr. House.

So be careful. Unless you've got Hugh coming over anyway, and he's able to lend a hand, you might end up doing yourself more harm than good. Many would disagree with me, of course. If you try it and it works for you, then that's great. But I rely so heavily on my little metaphorical inner "ear," that I keep far away from anything that will get between it and me. (I also like my literal inner ear. It keeps me from falling down.)

Lunch: chips and dips and wasabi peas eaten while Scrabbling!