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    June 11th, 2007Jane EspensonOn Writing

    You know that old “show, don’t tell” rule? Well, it can applied in a very specific way that can make jokes stronger and funnier. Look at this joke:


    A GUY
    He’s the finest man I’ve ever met.

    ANOTHER GUY
    He’s a degenerate liar!

    A GUY
    Yeah, that’s what I said.

    Bleah. It’s just so… bald and defensive and familiar. It feels like an old radio joke. But don’t you think it’s better with this small change?


    A GUY
    He’s the finest man I’ve ever met.

    ANOTHER GUY
    He’s a degenerate liar!

    A GUY
    Who will burn in hell forever and ever, praise God.

    Doesn’t that feel better? Instead of telling us that he’s got a certain opinion, our Guy is demonstrating that opinion by actively condemning.

    Here’s another example. Remember this from the movie Pretty Woman?


    Hollister
    Mr. Lewis? How’s it going so far?

    Edward
    Pretty well, I think. I think we need some major sucking up.

    Hollister
    Very well, sir. You’re… not only handsome, but a powerful man. I could see the second you walked in here, you were someone to reckon with…

    Edward
    Hollister.

    Hollister
    Yes, sir?

    Edward
    Not me. Her.

    If Hollister had just said “Yes, sir, I’ll see that you get a good flattering” or something, it wouldn’t have been as funny as him actually doing it. Instead of telling us, he’s showing us.

    There are some actions: flattering, condemning, promising, etc, that you do by speaking. Even though they’re not as active as diving through a window as a bomb goes off, they’re still active, they’re still a kind of doing. If you let your characters go ahead and do them, instead of just talking about what they think, you haven’t just made a better joke. You’ve also made a stronger, more active character.

    Sometimes rules are actually good.

    Lunch: fancy brunch at the Hotel Bel-Air. Sushi, egg tart, strawberry shortcake. Veddy veddy nice.